Writing, Typewriting, Orgasms, Sci Fi

Dear Friends,

As you know, every now and again I spek about the art and craft of writing. I have little useful to say, but that has never stopped a writer since Homer and it is not stopping me ;) At the recent Aemadillocon I was part of the wrting workshop and some good soul recorded a little of this. I pass this on to you for your amusement. I am the one in the black Hawaiian shirt. That pretty much sums me up -- a black Hawaiian shirt:

http://www.geekitude.com:80/gl/public_html/article.php?story=20080816163013291

I did my first writing on a Royal eltie, then an some forgotten electric and then I moved to the Texas Instruments 99-4a and it was word processors ever since. Fewer and fewer people use, maybe even have seen manual typewriters these days. My friend Chris Merwin pointec out their use in art recently:

http://www.wired.com:80/culture/art/multimedia/2008/09/gallery_typewriter

By the way if you are looking to buy a manual typewriter with ribbons, try the Vermont Country Store. (I know most people looking for manaul typewriters check out my blog):

http://www.vermontcountrystore.com/shopping/product/detailmain.jsp?itemID=32723&itemType=PRODUCT&RS=1&keyword=manual+typewriter


Now where do writers get their ideas. I was going to tell you, but I found a video clip that does this better than little me:


http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-4288569066705582333&ei=cRC_SO73N4XEqQK_8vShCQ&q=cartoon+writer&vt=lf&hl=en

And finally what do non-writers need to know in this world? I think Uncle Harlan says it best:

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=-7332343602969773583&ei=HRO_SNWnJKT2qgLgiPXnBw&q=+writer&vt=lf&hl=en

I will stick this at my blog at

http://doublesignletters.blogspot.com/

But feel free to pass this on to writerly friends anywhere,

Best,

Don

How To Write A Novel

s,How to write a novel in nine easy steps.

1. Read two or three novels. I would suggest ones you can get in paperback. Here are the three that come to mind for me:To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper Lee, The Devil's Own Work by Alan Judd, The Left Hand of Darkness by Ursula K. LeGuin -- they're all pretty short. Keep a journal of your reading. Note two things: What makes you interested (by really honest here -- what really keeps you focused -- not what youthink you should answer) and waft do you NOT see (for example in To Kill a Mockingbird by Harper "I am a LESBIAN, get it?" Lee there is only one heterosexual marriage that 'works". Sculpture is about removing what isn't part of the statue.

2. Do not write your experiences, write from your experiences.


3. You can not make things too tough for your main character.

4. Passive voice is bad, avoid forms of "is" anytime you can, avoid adverbs.


5. Senses are very important -- sex has a taste and smell as does everything else. Mention food and wine often.


6. There are no little people. Don't do this,"The shopkeeper sold Ralph a package of cigarettes." Do this, "The Korean shopkeeper has a Hitler mustache and smelled of kimchee as he handed me the cigarettes he said,'Malboros are a manly cigarette.' I didn't know if was a come-on, sarcasm or just what passed for salesman ship."

7. Don't write it in present tense. It really does not make the text more interesting. It just pisses people off.

8. Follow your weird. If what interests you are Roman sewers, Japanese pop culture and phenomenology --write about that.


9. Shakespeare had it right -- include death, violence, mystery, sex, love and humor in everything in varying amounts. I will send you some essays as well.


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Most web-advice on the novel sucks. Here is some that doesn't:

http://www.poewar.com/want-to-write-a-bad-novel-heres-how/

http://www.musik-therapie.at/PederHill/Structure&Plot.htm

http://www.selfgrowth.com/articles/Caine3.html


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Read these summaries to think about somethings that you can do with the novel
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Eye_(Nabokov_novel)

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Man_in_the_High_Castle

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/The_Western_Lands

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Blood_Meridian

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Truth_and_Bright_Water

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tarzan_of_the_Apes

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Tristram_Shandy

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/We_Have_Always_Lived_in_the_Castle

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/On_the_Road

The novel is anything you can get away with!